Toward The Light

I'm going to be controversial. Not like me, is it?

I was in that half-sleep state a few weeks ago as I was waking up and a sentence kept repeating through my mind:

Love is not what you are IN, it is what you ARE.

It is a profound statement that carries a powerful truth and one that is so often missed by those who talk about 'love' and those in the conspiracy research arena. The misunderstanding of the true nature of 'love' is at the heart of human manipulation and control, not least because of its potential to divide and rule.

I hear Christian Patriot believers talking about the destruction of the family unit and I can understand why they say that. But the 'family unit', far from being the ideal form of human interaction, as so many claim, is often the most destructive means of 'human interaction'.

I meet people all the time, some late in years, who are still psychologically and emotionally scarred by their relationship with their parents or children and this, apparently oh so wonderful 'family unit' has blighted their entire life.

Now it doesn't have to be like that and it's not always like that. There can be great love and friendship in the family group, and that's lovely, but so often there is the opposite.

What I am saying is that it is clearly not the family unit that makes the difference between harmony and conflict in these situations, it is love and friendship.

And love and friendship does not need a 'family' to express itself. It can be found, and not found, in every situation.

What is a family? It starts with two people, usually a man and woman, entering into a relationship in which both declare that they are in love with each other. But wait: Love is not what you are IN, it is what you ARE.

Being IN love is a chemical/electromagnetic attraction. It is a genetic body-consciousness phenomenon and when mind control experts want to make two people attracted to each other - 'fall in love' - they only have to stimulate certain chemicals in the brain and bingo! - 'I love you' and 'I love you, too'.

Once again, you can truly love someone on every level and so enjoy a loving and 'in' love relationship. But these are rare, if the truth be told. Most relationships are founded on electro-chemical attraction, need, fear of being alone and what's in it for me. Love, in its infinite sense, is nowhere to be seen.

How many times do you hear 'love' song lyrics say 'I need you' or 'I can't live without you'? Most of popular music is founded on such sentiments. But it's all crap.

We are Infinite Consciousness and yet we 'need' or 'can't live without' another hologram? Please. But the illusion, the fake identity we believe in, means that we fall for it.

Even the dictionary definitions of 'love' perpetuate the theme. One defines love as: 'To have a feeling of intense desire and attraction toward (a person)'.  But that is not love, it is 'in' love ... attraction. And 'in' can soon go 'out'. Friendship, true friendship, is forever because it is closer to real love - love without condition.

So the family unit is invariably built, through the original man and woman, on a complete misunderstanding of what love is. Not a good start to say the least, but, as I keep stressing, there will always be exceptions.

Then along come the children and further potential for disharmony as the years go by. They say blood is thicker than water, but blood is not nearly as 'thick' as consciousness. An unconscious family unit with parents and children can be the most dysfunctional of all human relationships as the genetic programs compete with each other. It can become just a struggle for power and dominance and the last place you will find love and friendship.

Love is a word that's thrown around all the time and mostly it is meaningless bullshit. It sounds good, but what does it really mean? It is so easy to say - 'I love you' - there you go, that's how easy it is. But I don't have to mean it, let alone understand it, to parrot the words or tap these keys.

People say 'I love you' and then treat each other disgracefully. As the song goes: where is the love?

Without question, the people (of all kinds) throughout my life who have told me most often that they loved me, cared for me and supported me turned out to be the ones who, through their actions, loved me, cared for me and supported me the least. Indeed, they have been the most disruptive and destructive of forces. I have had a legal case with one of them running for more than three years now because he tried to hijack my books after stealing large amounts of money.

'I love you, man', he would say to the point of tedium, 'I would do anything for you and your work'. Yeah, try to steal it, mostly.

What crap it all is, this 'love', this 'support', which people pledge with their mouth and ignore with their actions. Albert Einstein summed up 'family' love and electro-chemical 'love' when he said:

'A human being is a part of a whole, called by us "universe", a part limited in time and space. He experiences himself, his thoughts and feelings as something separated from the rest ... a kind of optical delusion of his consciousness.

This delusion is a kind of prison for us, restricting us to our personal desires and to affection for a few persons nearest to us. Our task must be to free ourselves from this prison by widening our circle of compassion to embrace all living creatures and the whole of nature in its beauty.'

That's the point about body-consciousness 'love' - it restricts us 'to our personal desires and to affection for a few persons nearest to us'. This is not 'love'; It is  different versions of 'in love'.

A far more loving form of human relationship is what we call friendship.  The dynamics between friends and 'love' partners are dramatically different. They can be the same if 'in' love and friendship are both present, but often they're not.

When someone is in trouble or needs help, a friend will always be there immediately. No judgement, no condemnation, no 'what about me?' The only question is: 'How can I help?'

But 'partner relationships', or 'coupleism', as I heard it described this week, can be very different. In a relationship founded on electro-chemical attraction, need, fear of being alone and what's in it for me, supporting the person in trouble can be the last thing on the mind of their 'mate'.

I have seen people in times of enormous stress being subjected to hair-raising tantrums by their 'in love' partner just when they needed true love and understanding. Why? Because there was no friendship, no empathy. The much-pledged 'love' was an electro-chemical fake.

I have had relationships based on friendship and when the 'partner' stage has ended those people have remained in my life because we are friends. The basic bond of friendship allows a relationship to take a different form, but still remain intact, even grow.

I have had relationships based on electro-chemical attraction, without the foundation of friendship, which were highly destructive. This is no coincidence. If friendship is not the rock on which a relationship is built then what is left is a house of sand destined to fall. It is only a matter of when.

How appropriate that the very word 'friend' originates from words meaning 'to love'. This comes from Thefreedictionary.com:

'The relationship between Latin am cus "friend" and am "I love" is clear, as is the relationship between Greek philos "friend" and phile "I love." In English, though, we have to go back a millennium before we see the verb related to friend. At that time, fr ond, the Old English word for "friend," was simply the present participle of the verb fr on, "to love".'

Yes, friendship is 'to love' in its truest sense. Real love is something you can trust because it will always do what is right and not think about itself in every situation. And trust is the basis of friendship. You don't have to think 'will they be there for me when I need them?', because you know they will.

How many friends do you have that you can always totally rely on? How many can totally rely on you? It is usually not many, although there are again exceptions, because of the way human relationships have been pepper-bombed by 'in love' and what about me, me, me?

Enormous numbers of marriages are a sham, held together 'for the kids' or by financial security or fear of change. The partners are often bored and feel taken-for-granted and uncared for, but somehow the marriage limps along year after tedious year.

It seems from my observations that the marriages that are outwardly promoted as so perfect are the ones that fall apart the quickest once a problem arises. I have known 'his-and-her' sweater couples who 'I love you ... and I love you' all the time and yet when eventually something goes wrong their 'rock-like' marriage collapses overnight.

The 'in-love' and the claim to be 'in-love' relationships don't stand a chance without friendship and we are talking massive numbers, I would suggest. We would be staggered at how many sham relationships there are at all levels of global society if we could read the thoughts of both partners.

As people awaken to their true nature, relationships are bound to change. The ball-and-chain version is doomed once consciousness kicks in because expanded awareness will not be forced to conform to the blueprint of another.

Awakening people don't need 'the other half' to become whole because they are becoming whole within themselves. That immediately changes the dynamics of any relationship they get involved with, not just with a 'love' partner, but relationships of all kinds.

I have seen so many relationships break-up as one partner becomes conscious while the other stays the same and we are entering a time when vast numbers of relationships will not conform to the family unit that has dominated society since the demise of the tribal extended family. This unit will still be the choice of many, but others will choose to be alone or live in a more communal setting.

All are equally valid so long as it is a matter of free choice and not the imposition of society norms. I have lived alone for the past year and a half and I certainly wouldn't change that, not for the moment, anyway.

'Oh, look at that poor man, living alone and he's 56. He must be so lonely.' Lonely? I love it because I can be me at all times and awakening consciousness insists on that freedom from conformity, be it to the blueprint of another individual or society as a whole.

The key here is not the way we choose to live or how we choose to express a relationship. Live as a couple or in a commune, it doesn't matter. If friendship is not present in any of these situations then disharmony will be. I have seen 'free and loving' communal groups who were, in reality, nothing more than a hierarchy ruled by the strongest character with no real love or friendship to be seen. It is not the situation that matters; it is the state of consciousness.

This even applies to living on your own. We should be our own best friend, but so often we are not. I have learned in the last 18 months that this is, actually, the most important friendship of all - to be a friend to yourself.

Friendship is the greatest of all relationships and by that I mean a true friendship. There are endless people who talk about being your friend who are just out to use you for their own ends.

How do you know a true friend?

By actions, not words.

from David Icke Newsletter 26 October 2008